Wednesday, April 21, 2010

memories...

Ryan and I watched the family movie that dad made of the year 2007 earlier today. At first I was just putting the movie in for him so I could go clean the bathrooms but the first part of the movie was Ryan's dedication at church when he was a newborn (boy did I look awful!) and I was hooked after that. I had tears in my eyes for most of it. I don't know why looking back is so sad! Hannah looked so sweet and young (she is sweet but you know, the toddler sweet). Her hair was so long and she was so little and could hardly talk. Kara was just an infant too. You should have seen cousin Michael. He looked so little and innocent! It was great to watch. I really need to figure out what I need to have to be able to make those movies of my own home videos. I used to spend a lot of time dwelling on the past and not wanting my kids to grow up but then I spent a lot of time in earnest prayer asking God to help me just enjoy every minute that I have NOW with my kids. It is hard to not constantly ask if I'm making the right decisions or taking enough pics so I'll never forget a single moment. God really did take all that anxiety away. I rarely think about it now. Same with having another baby. I used to dwell on it and want it so bad but I truely turned it over to God and I don't spend every waking moment thinking of how I can talk Brad into it. I know that it is all in God's hands. I always knew it is all in God's hands but it's hard to really let go of it. Anyway, so I've been thinking about the kids being little all day today since I watched that movie and I'm trying to forget it but I want to watch the movie again!

4 comments:

  1. I'm SO happy for you. I also spent a lot of time wishing the future would come instead of enjoying my life now. I also am so much better at that! Praise God for answering our prayers and changing our hearts!!

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  2. I have MAYBE one video of the kids when they were little and I am SO upset about that. I wish I had several to go back and look at. I took lots of pics, but I totally regret not having video. Enjoy!

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  3. I'm sad that I have no video of Hannah as a baby. If I have another I'll have so much video that I won't know what to do with it all!

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  4. When I start looking at pictures, I ALWAYS get "sucked" in! It is hard to give in and give "it" all to God! I know exactly how you feel!

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